trigger happy

my poor babybee... he belongs to this really jologs company where bosses don't know the kind of business they're running and where an "office manager" is trying so hard to ispokening dollars and sound really, really fugly in the process. here's an example of a company memo from ms. "office manager". names have been changed after careful thought. lol.

some parts are fairly written but then there are certain jolts in her grammar that make things sound funny. just because it's written in english doesn't mean it's english.. have a laugh!

As the manager of this office, I believe that everyone of us know that I am responsible in managing the physical and internal aspects of Monsters Inc office which means I am liable for any abuse or misuse of the resources we have. I believe that this is the right time to take this job more seriously than how I did in the past. It doesn't mean that I can no longer spend some time talking, laughing and be-clown to everyone. It only means that I have to put a final line between being me and being the Office Manager of this Company.

In relation to this, I need to clarify some things & set some In-House Rules for everyone.

1>Please be informed that the pantry supplies such as coffee, creamer, juice & sugar doesn't have approved budget by them (Texas) since we haven't hit the targeted date of the project that supports that request.

However, I would supply coffee & creamer + sugar, tea / juice for those who doesn't drink coffee using the petty cash fund, but with limited stock only. Meaning, I would only supply on the 1st and third week of each month with budgeted amount. If we consume it all before the next supplies come, I guess we can all buy for ourselves if we want to.

2>With regards to the reimbursement, I just want to clarify with everybody that I am not allowed to reimburse just anything without prior approval. I already put myself into risk by just considering everything. However, any reimbursement that has been requested before this will still be considered. From this moment on, any purchases of office or pantry supplies without my knowledge and approval will be considered as your own expenses and will not be granted for reimbursement. In cases of project related expenses, you must ask approval from Shirley and Shirley will just inform me if she is signing off for this request or not.

3>We are not so strict with office attire but we have to set some limitations to it. Absolutely no sandos, shorts & slippers allowed during weekdays. Night-shift people are exempted to this rule as long as you are not naked and just make sure that when you have to stay longer in the morning you still look like an employee. For Day-shift people, From Monday to Thursday, all is requested to wear something that would fit in this  area. A semi-business attire will do. Shirts with collar is required for boys.

4>It is a must that before leaving the office, you must turn-off your computer monitor. It is being observed that most of us don't do that. During Friday or Saturday for those in the Night Shift, please make sure that  your monitor & computer is off before leaving. By doing this we can help minimize the consumption of the power supply and avoid untowards incident.

5>In a case than somebody has to work during the Holidays and Weekend, you ask for approval from your immediate supervisor. If approved by them they are the one who is responsible for letting me know about it.

In emergency cases, with the request or instruction from the US people, and suddenly you have to report in the office, with Shirley or Ben being aware of it, they can inform me afterwards.

And also, for Saturday, Sunday & Holidays work, I am requesting everybody to post in our yahoo group your log-in & log-out time. Just go to our yahoogroup, then post and type on the subject field the word log-in or log -out plus the actual PI Time. With that I could summarize and somehow justify the power consumption every month.

In cases of power outage or internet disconnection, it should be fully noted and submitted to me. At least one of you should be responsible enough to just put it into writing for my record keeping when I am not around.

These may give you more works to do but, these are the only things for now that I could think of in monitoring the activity here in the office in connection to the use of resources. If cooperation from you will not be materialized, I will be forced to use other means such as getting records from the log-in, log-out book in the lobby. By the way, as of this  moment, I already instructed the guards at the lobby to have you log-in & out on their logbook especially during the weekends & holidays.

That would be all for now. I am requesting for your full cooperation.